The guests at Lucietta's Inn are a motley collection. There are two Scottish exiles, Angus, a penniless Laird and his long-
KATE Let's think o' Harlequin.
TAM On second thoughts, mebbe I cannae dae it.
KATE It's simple. Jist watch whit I dae and copy it. Right?
TAM I'm watchin.
KATE We'll try the dance..
TAM Dance? Naebody said onythin aboot dancin!
KATE You can shairly dance. Ony Scot can dance.
TAM No me. Last time I tried a hieland sword dance, my feet were in bandages for a fortnight.
KATE We can but try. Watch this. (She demonstrates) You see? Keep the weight on your taes. Very lightly. Let's see you. (He gallops about) You're right. You cannae dance.
TAM If I practised....
KATE In ten year's time, whae kens? I'd better show you how tae fall.
TAM When dae I fall?
KATE When you're hit.
TAM Hit?
KATE Like this. (She demonstrates. He falls) That wasnae bad. Beginner's luck.
TAM Folk jist hit me?
KATE Pantalone does it a' the time. But you can hit back.
TAM Can I? I'll enjoy that bit.
KATE Now let's try the different emotions. (Moving close to him) I'm shair you've got emotions.
TAM (retreating) Aye. Especially fear.
KATE Nae need tae teach that yin. We'll try happiness. Mind you'll be wearin a mask so you must yase your eyes and mouth. Like this.
TAM Get awa!
KATE It's exaggerated. Larger than life.
TAM Like this?
KATE Smile mair. Can you no smile? (He does) That'll dae for pain. Try pain. (He does) That'll dae for surprise. We're gettin somewhere. Now anger. Hatred. Rage. No! You look mair like you're burstin. Be angry. Imagine some Englishman has cried Rob Roy a pansy.
TAM I thocht he was.
KATE Robert the Bruce then.
TAM Whit? (Turns on an imaginary Englishman) Insult Bruce would you? Forgotten Bannockburn have you? Want a reminder?
KATE Fine, Tam, fine. Nae need tae overdae it. Now try sorrow. Sadness. Think o' somethin you feel sorry aboot.
TAM (with a long face) Gettin taegled in this?
KATE Very convincin.
TAM Is that it?
KATE No, there's yin important emotion I missed. Love.
TAM Love?
KATE And passion. You ken whit they are?
TAM I think I read aboot them somewhere. Dae I need tae be passionate?
KATE Tae me.
TAM You?
KATE In the play, I'm Colombina. Harlequin is my lover. And I think we should practise.